I know it’s been a long time since I have written, and frankly I don’t think I am up to writing a part two of my last entry. Do you ever fall into moods where everything seems crazy and upside down? I have been trying to pull myself out of one oof those. I haven’t had to do this in many years. It’s stemming from trauma, but honestly, I don’t think there is a way to stop it. I think the key may be in learning to go with it. I think we have not allowed ourselves to feel loss, pain, insecurity out loud. We have kept it in so long, we are bursting at the seams.
Sometimes I think just saying hello to the clerk at the grocery store might have me crying, and I notice a lot of people are using self-checkout. Is the grocery store now some kind of metaphor for life? Perhaps positive interaction is beginning to elude us. Our evolution may be one breath from ending, but living like here is no tomorrow is all we know how to do. Knowing this, I’m going to try to be better for the sake of humanity I suppose. I don’t think we all fit into one box, and maybe there is some good in us that can be found in the everyday ordinary life of a human.